Understanding the Internal Pressure of Perfectionism and Its Link to Burnout
Do you often find yourself thinking:
· That’s not good enough!
· I should have done better?
· If I make a mistake, everyone will think I’m not good enough!
· I should stay late to finish this, even though I’m exhausted!
· If I take a break, I’m letting my students down!
· My marking needs to be more detailed—what if I miss something?
· If I don’t get outstanding observations, I’m failing!
Maybe you set impossibly high standards for yourself, only to feel frustrated when you don’t meet them. Perfectionism, while often seen as a strength, can become a double-edged sword—driving relentless self-criticism and a constant feeling of never measuring up. Over time, this internal pressure can chip away at your confidence, leave you feeling exhausted, and even lead to burnout. Understanding the different forms of perfectionism and how they impact your well-being is the first step towards breaking free from this cycle.
The Three Faces of Perfectionism
Perfectionism isn't a one-size-fits-all trait; it manifests in various forms:
Rigid Perfectionism: Individuals with this trait adhere strictly to rules and high standards, often becoming inflexible in their pursuits. They believe there's only one correct way to achieve outcomes, leaving little room for adaptability.
Self-Critical Perfectionism: This form involves a relentless self-scrutiny where individuals constantly feel their efforts are inadequate. They are prone to negative self-evaluation and hold fears of not meeting expectations.
Narcissistic Perfectionism: Here, the focus shifts outward, with individuals expecting perfection from others while maintaining a grandiose self-image. They often become critical when others don't meet their exacting standards.
Crux Psychology
Let’s look at this in action…
Rigid Perfectionism – The Rule Follower
Alex, the Unyielding Head of Department
Alex is a Head of Maths who believes that every lesson, assessment, and student outcome must adhere to a strict set of rules. He insists that all lesson plans follow the same structure, every worksheet be formatted identically, and all marking be completed with absolute precision. When his team suggests a more efficient or creative approach, he refuses, fearing that any deviation from the "perfect" method will compromise results.
Alex’s rigidity not only places immense pressure on himself but also frustrates his department, stifling innovation and adaptability. His relentless pursuit of perfection creates a stressful working environment, where staff feel micromanaged and unable to experiment with new teaching strategies. Over time, the burden of maintaining absolute control leads to exhaustion and, ultimately, burnout.
Self-Critical Perfectionism – The Harsh Inner Voice
Sam, the Overworked Teacher
Sam, from our case study, exemplifies self-critical perfectionism. Despite receiving praise for her teaching methods, she constantly feels her lessons aren't good enough. She spends hours refining materials, reworking plans, and second-guessing herself. Because her school promotes "high standards" without defining them, she never feels she’s meeting expectations. Sam’s self-doubt keeps her in a cycle of overwork and emotional exhaustion, ultimately leading to burnout.
Narcissistic Perfectionism – The Expectation Imposer
Jordan, the Demanding Director of Education
Jordan is a Director of Education who expects nothing less than perfection from his staff. He has exceptionally high standards for teaching quality, student outcomes, and school performance. While his vision for excellence is clear, he frequently undermines and pressures teachers who don’t meet his expectations, assuming that everyone should operate at his level. When a teacher tries a new approach that doesn’t yield immediate top-tier results, he criticises them harshly instead of offering constructive support.
Jordan’s unrealistic expectations create a culture of fear and stress, with staff constantly second-guessing themselves. Many feel undervalued and overworked, leading to high staff turnover and disengagement. Despite his outward reputation for driving high standards, Jordan often feels disappointed in his team and struggles to build positive, long-term relationships with staff.
The Perfectionism-Burnout Connection in Teaching
In the relentless pursuit of perfection, many teachers push themselves beyond their limits, constantly striving to meet unrealistic expectations. The pressure to create flawless lesson plans, maintain impeccable classrooms, and meet ever-changing standards can be overwhelming. Over time, this constant striving drains both mental and physical energy, leading to burnout—a state of emotional exhaustion, detachment from students and colleagues, and a deep sense of not being "good enough," no matter how much effort is given.
Sam's Journey: A Case Study
Consider Sam, teacher and a dedicated professional who exemplifies self-critical perfectionism. From a young age, Sam believed her work was never good enough, a mindset exacerbated by a school culture that emphasised high achievement without clear guidelines. In her career, the leadership's constant rhetoric about "high standards" lacked concrete definitions, leaving Sam without clear goals. This ambiguity trapped her in a cycle of overexertion, as she perpetually aimed to exceed undefined expectations. The absence of measurable targets led to continuous self-doubt and a relentless drive to do more. Over time, this unsustainable cycle eroded her self-worth and well-being.
The Turning Point
Sam's unyielding quest for perfection eventually led to burnout. Recognising the need for change, she took a leave of absence to focus on her mental health. Investing in private counselling provided her with coping strategies and a fresh perspective on her self-imposed pressures. Subsequently, engaging with a coach facilitated a structured and supportive return to work, emphasising accountability and realistic goal-setting.
Recognising Perfectionism in Yourself
Awareness is the first step toward change. If you resonate with Sam's experience or identify with any forms of perfectionism, consider taking a self-assessment to evaluate your tendencies. Resources like the Perfectionism Test by Psychology Today can offer valuable insights.Psychology Today
Breaking the Cycle: Strategies for Change
Set Realistic Goals: Define achievable objectives to provide direction and a sense of accomplishment.
Embrace Imperfection: Acknowledge that mistakes are part of growth and learning.
Seek Support: Engage with professionals or support groups to share experiences and coping strategies.
Practice Self-Compassion: Treat yourself with kindness and understanding, especially during setbacks.
Take the First Step Towards Recovery
If you find yourself caught in the cycle of perfectionism and it's impacting your well-being, consider seeking support. Booking a free session can be a pivotal step toward understanding and addressing the root causes of your burnout. Schedule your session here.
Remember, striving for excellence is admirable, but it's essential to balance ambition with self-care to lead a fulfilling and healthy life.
